{ Crazy Love Chapter 2 }

I know.

I didn't get my chapter two post up on time. Do you really expect anything else from me?

Chapter 2...
I LOVED chapter 2. I touched a little last week, er uhmm the last time I posted about Crazy Love, the beginning of chapter 2 talking about being too busy for God. The irony that I didn't have time to get the chapter 2 post up on time is not lost on me. I'm getting it done and that's what matters.

I've been really busy getting my photos rounded up so I could make a facebook page for my business. I had a photo shoot on Saturday. I am editing photos like mad. Tim and I are trying to buy a outdoor wood burner so we don't pay $2500 in gas again this winter. We are trying to figure out how to pay for that. I'm in the works of taking on a couple more daycare kids to pay for the previously mentioned wood stove.

All in all, I'm trying to not worry and stress out about the things of this world. Which is h.a.r.d for me! I analyze. I worry. I stress.

As I read chapter 2 what else would be the subject of discussion?

"Worry implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what is happening in our lives."

"Stress says that the things we are involved in are more important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace towards others, or our tight grip of control."

As I read these I'm thinking he wrote these words just.for.me!

I know when I get stressed out, it's physically and mentally draining. So much of my energy goes into what I am thinking about it, I not only spend less time praising God but tend to get snippy with the people around me. Unintentionally I have told myself it's ok to be impatient with my kids or husband because I'm stressed out, don't they know?! I had never thought of it like I was treating them like my stress was more important than they are.

So I will be working on that.

When I worry I don't go tell the girls every single thing that I am worrying about. As a parent it's my job to make my kids joyful and happy, not to burden them with doubts and things that may or may not happen. I love them enough to not want to cause them any heartache. As a parent that is a given, it's what we do. How is it any different that with Our Heavenly Father? He loves us enough to take care of the happening in our lives. He doesn't want me worrying about bits of my life anymore than I want my kids worrying. It's my job to take care of my girls, and it's His job to take care of us. We just need to have faith that He is!

Sometimes that is harder than other times. Sometimes life can be tough. Sometimes things happen that we don't understand. Sometimes we don't get to see the big picture and sometimes we do.

"If life were stable, I'd never need God's help. Since it's not, I reach out to Him regularly. I am thankful for the unknowns and that I don't have control, because it makes me run to God."

I know for me when I need something, when I don't quite understand what is happening I pray much more. I lean with a lot more pressure on God. My relationship with God gets stronger because I am showing up. I am making more of an effort. I'm not saying that is neccassarily right, I'm just saying it's true. In everyone's life there are ups and downs. They are highs and lows. It's hard to understand why a child gets cancer, why a building is bombed, why a terrific mother loses her unborn baby. It's hard to not question God in today's world.

I love how Frances Chan wrote...
"Maybe life is pretty good for you right now. God has given you the good stuff so that you can show the world a person who enjoys blessings, but who is still totally obsessed with God.

Or maybe life is tough right now, and everything feels like a struggle. God has allowed hard things in your life so you can show the world that your God is great and that knowing Him brings peace and joy, even when like is hard."

We forget life isn't all about us. It's not about what we want. We were created for Him, by Him. No matter where your life is at, tough or good, either way we are suppose to be glorifying God. The point of our life is to point to Him. Good times and in bad. We aren't suppose to worry about whether or not we can afford a wood stove. We need to wonder what else we can do to draw closer to God because we can't afford to lose Him. Our main purpose on earth is to glorify Him, then He'll make all the other details fall into place.

So I shall not worry. I will walk with Him. I will talk with Him. I will trust in Him. For He is everything.

{ going, going, gone. }

{ going }



{ going}



{ going }



{ gone }

{ Eli, the accidental photo shoot }

If you come to my blog to see my photos, this is the week for you!

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Remember last week when I loaded up props and Kenna then drove 15 miles away to do a test photo shoot for the real one I had coming up on the weekend? Remember how I said I forgot my camera and had to go back the next day to practice?

With the little boy I babysit.

I told his mom if he was coming with me, he was fair game. {grin} I'm trying to build up my portfolio on my website and he was a convient subject.

His mom hasn't seen these yet but I'm guessing she is going to be pleasantly surprised.







Then I saw this car and my heart skipped a beat. What could make this old car look better? A boy! And I just happened to have one handy.











I'm wasn't sure my lens knew what to do with a little boy in front of it. There is not one lick of pink in any of these photos!

His mom had packed along his favorite blanket and wanted a couple pictures taken with it since it's his "security thing." I wasn't real sure how I was going to incorporate a loved blanket into a outdoor photo shoot until I saw this bench.

It turned out to be my favorite shot of the day. {Well my favorite shot of Eli. Miss Sass was a rockstar that day, literally. I'll get her pictures up soon!}



He looks thrilled doesn't he?

He really was having fun!


Thanks for tagging along Eli.

I know like you really had a choice. {grin}

{ Bailey, Senior Portraits }

You may remember earlier this year when we went on vacation? My cousin and her family was able to spend a few days in Canada with us this year. Well one of her daughters is a senior this year.

Are you thinking what we were thinking?

If you were going to say, "what better time to get some unique senior pictures taken" you are correct!

I lost track of how many hours we shot that day. 3 in the morning and another 2 in the evening maybe? All I know is I took a lot of pictures. I have been narrowing them down and editing for months now.

Yesterday I had another photo shoot and told myself I wouldn't even take those pictures off my camera until I had my cousins done.

So without any further ado, Bailey Jane here is a sneak peek at my favorites.



















Looking back at these made me remember how much fun I had that day. While this next picture may not be my very favorite shot, it was my very favorite part of the day! {grin}



Don't worry, I have another 40 some more to show you. I hope they were worth the wait!

{ A ballerina and a 4 wheeler }

I was cleaning out my photobucket account the other day when I stumbled across the following photos. Sometimes I upload pictures so I don't forget to post them on my blog.

Then I forget to post them.

Remember this photo shoot? I took pictures of our friend's kids and afterwards we stayed and talked. Imagine that, Tim and I talking! {grin}

One thing led to another and this happened...


Nothing like a ballerina on a muddy 4-wheeler! Just look at that big grin thru the helmet!


Kenna doesn't look overly confident in Kinzley's driving ability.


For some reason Kinzley wasn't nervous at all to ride with Kenna. Little does she know!



Damian has a bit of a crush on Kinz so he thought it would be great to ride with Kinzley.


He wanted her to hold onto him but she was having none of that!


Notice the other little drivers in the back?

These two were animals. No fear at all.



They wanted to be were the "big kids" were. While us parents held our breath waiting for them to run into each other. Or I should say for the little pink car to get run over.

Damien had a great idea to let Kinzley drive. He was a typical boy and had ulterior motives. Notice him hang on to her. {grin} She wasn't so much for it and ran into a fence!



I'm so glad I found these photos! It was such a fun night.

{ I may have created a monster }

You may remember this post from a couple days ago in which I mentioned the photo shoot that Kinzley wanted.

You heard that right.

She had been outside playing and comes tearing thru the house, goes into her room, re-arranges her entire dresser and comes out wearing a new outfit.

An outfit that techincally could have went together. The colors matched. It's not an outfit I'd have let her wear in public but she was quite pleased with herself. Not quite as pleased with the outfit as the pile of leaves she had raked up though.

I wasn't really in the mood for pictures {gasp} but when she informed me that she always take pictures for me whenever I want them and I could surely go take a few for her, I had no choice.

To the leaf pile we went...where she proceeded to pose for me...

leg up.
leg down.
on her knee.
holding a pile of leaves.

on her back.
on her stomach.
on her side.
some with smiles, some without.



She fell in the leaves...


She threw them in the air...


She pretended she was a dog digging in them.
She tried to do a backbend.


I'm not overly sure what she was trying to do to her sister who was wanting no part in this shoot.


She hid behind a tree holding leaves.


So posed to her hearts content...






Then she did this which cracks.me.up...



Thanks for the photo shoot Kinz. You gave me some new ideas! {grin}

{ Amazed }

Sometime I amaze even myself.

Like in the case last night when I made chicken pot pie only to realize the thawed pie crust was stuck to the metal pan and I couldn't pop it out to add to the top. When I did try it tore and there was no way it would be soft enough to pinch the edges of both pie crusts together. After filling my bottom pie crust I really hoped the filling would stay inside and not run out the edges. I couldn't really microwave metal . {Trust me, I made that mistake before}

It was while I was looking at the microwave and wondering how long it would take to soften at room temperature when I noticed the HS on our stove. HS stands for hot stove. Perfect. I flipped the top crust on and waited 5 minutes and it literally fell right off and I was able to pinch the sides together.

I am a thinker, let me tell ya.

Then again today I amazed myself. Amazing.

I spend the morning with Kinzley's Kindergarten class in the prairie behind the school. The prairie with that I didn't know existed. Our town isn't that big. I can't believe they hid a prairie.

I'd love to show you the close up pictures I took of Kinzley but that would mean I would actually have taken some. Which was a little hard to do being she was sandwiched in between two friends at the front of the line.



She is always at the front. One of the first three in line without question. This morning when they lined up to go in the school there was already a line formed. Instead of getting in the back of the line she stands right next to the first girl in line and proceeds to tell everyone that she is the start of the line and convinced kids to move behind her. That is until she saw me looking like I was having a seizure jerking my head to the back of the line. Then she has the gall to innocently look at me, put her hands in the air and ask "What?"

Believe it or not when I asked the teacher if she is bossy in school she looked at me dead on and acted like she couldn't believe I'd ask that. Huh, she'll learn.

Anyways...the prairie...was wet...and buggy...and the weeds {er I mean prairie grass} was tall...over my head...I guess they go back in the spring after they burn it to show the kids.



That's cool.

Here is what else is cool...



This spider web really tested my photographying {pretty sure that's not a word} skills. For the life of me, I couldn't get it to focus on the tiny web strands. It kept picking up on the kids in the background. They all continued down the path while I figured out I needed to manually focus the lens.

Like I said, I amazed myself sometimes.

The kids thought it was pretty cool too. Well until one little guy proceeded to walk into it. I didn't show it to Kinzley. I thought there was no need for her to have a freak out session in the middle of a prairie because there were spiders out there. No need for that at all.

Two wet shoes and 14 mosquito bites later, I went home and loaded up the back of my Suburban with wild outfits for Kenna. Tutu's, a tiara, 2 pair of boots, knee socks, lollipops, even a bar stool. I have a photo shoot Saturday in a nearby town that I have never shot at before and I had the perfect little model to do some tests shots with.

Back to school to eat lunch with Kinz. Picked up Kenna. Went out to recess where the bigger kids about tore my little daughter's limbs off trying to get to be the one to play with her. 30 minutes later, Sass and I are in the car, paid a bill and a one mile outside of the town I needed to find backgrounds for when I realize.....

This is where I once again amaze myself....

I realize...

I didn't bring my camera.

It's on my kitchen counter.

Great.

Instead Kenna and I drive around. We did find some possible places. We walked thru back alley's, where I had a fleeting thought that murders always happen in alleys. {To much CSI anyone?} We play at a park and within roughly 5 minutes of being there, Kenna needs to go to the bathroom.

The park has no bathroom.

We walk up the road to an old barn that sells antiques. All I can say is I fell in love with the place as soon as we walked up. It was amazing. An old green screen door on the front. Window boxes with real corn stalks instead of flowers. I smelled candles as soon as we walked in. The bathroom had an old sliding door. The trim was old barnboards. There were old ladders hung on the ceiling with white Christmas lights. My heart filled with joy with the quaintness.

Because I am a snoop, I got a little background info. The barn was built in the late 1800's and the horses used to haul something down to the river. I'd have a few more specific details however my daughter was pulling the lids off the candles to sniff them as fast as she could. When she got a hold of the ceramic chicken eggs I kind of quit listening. All I know is it had history and was cool.

In the end forgetting my camera worked out to my advantage. I probably wouldn't have went inside this store had I been taking pictures on main street instead.

Now tomorrow after I drop Kinz off at school, Kenna and I {& the little boy I babysit. I take all the models I can get} are heading back 15 miles to the town to try check out the backgrounds and lighting.

Again.

Ya know, if I remember my camera.

But we may have to take a detour because there is a Pumpkin Spice candle calling my name.

..................

On an unrelated note....I'm also quite amazed that I finally figured out how to make a photo storyboard {where I have the pictures side by side} that doesn't lose all the resolution in my photos.

That has been driving.me.crazy.

{ Makeover }

Ya'll like the new look? And the new name?

{Sometimes I like to throw a ya'll in here and pretend I'm from the south. I figure if my 3 year old gets away with having a southern accent I should be able to also. Right?}

I have been wanting to change my blog name for a while now. It's quite clear I don't post my jewelry on here. {grin} Which reminds me I did list a new design last night and did I remember to post it here? Nope!

My blog has become more of a journal of my life. My girls, my family, my God. Since starting this blog I have started my photography business on top of making jewelry and didn't want to have seperate blogs for each. Based on my track record from my jewelry who knows if I'll actually post my clients photos anyways. {grin} So I thought I'd just make it Shawna & Co.
Company can either stand for my jewelry, my photos or my girls who I am always in company with.

I was just posting to let ya'll know that I won't be posting tonight, I seemed to have used up all my allotted computer time making over my blog today. But since I just wrote three paragraphs I guess you are getting a post from me after all. {Just ask my family/friends, I ramble on and on when I talk in real life too!}

Anywho....I get this itch to change the look of things every once in a while. It was either this or paint one of my rooms in my house a new color. So I opted for sitting down all day at the computer.

Maybe tomorrow I'll be back with some some great in-depth post.

Yeah or maybe not.

Maybe I'll just post some new pictures from a photo shoot Kinz made me have with her.

You heard that right. I had to go outside with my camera and snap pictures while she chose the poses. And her own outfit.

It was interesting to say the least.

For now take a look around at my pretty newly organized blog. If it's anything like our house it won't last this way for long.

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Did ya'll know that according to blogger spell check ya'll isn't even a word?

{ 4 Wheelin' }

The other night we were standing around in the yard when I had a idea....

I wonder....







All was good until...



Then the girls wanted to see if Chewy could pull too...


Kinzley tried to help, but he wasn't going anywhere...

{Here is where this gets good!}





Kenna was a little bent out of shape her Dad made her crash...
And she got her shirt "dirty."



Kinz decided she needs a turn...
She wasn't nearly as brave as her baby sister...


Evidently this is hard work...


Who needs a motorized 4 wheeler?